Saturday, February 6, 2010

Quick Update (Actually, not so quick, but an update all the same)

Well, yesterdays retail therapy continued into the evening.  :o)  Ross & I went into the city and bought a new tent.  Now, considering we actually already have 3, this would probably seem a little over the top...  However this is one for hiking.  The 2 man tent weighs only 2kg.  It cost us $109 from Aussie Disposals.  There was on for $49, however the cheaper one weighed 3kg.  On the surface this probably doesn't seem like a lot, but when you have 15-20 kgs on your back the extra kilo makes a huge difference!

I am starting to get really excited about our hike, and can't wait until I can start training for it.  We now have nearly everything we need, so it is just a matter of getting the body ready.  We have decided to use Ross's old army packs and webbing belts to carry everything, which has saved us a lot of money.  The only thing is, they are all army green.  Blech...  So I have decided to "girl-ify" the one I am using.  I am going to get some cool patches and bright buttons, and make it as girlie as possible!  I can't wait.

The other thing I found was a few more funky plates from the Harris Scarfe sale.

On to a bit more serious news, I am off to hospital on Monday.  Just a quick overview of what has been happening.  On Monday I discovered I was pregnant.  We were stunned to say the least.  I actually thought I had started early menopause based on all the symptoms.  So when we found out about the pregnancy I knew instantly that there was something not right.  It is hard to say how I knew, I just knew.

So after 4 days of being a pin cushion, and having scans and seeing doctors, we now know for sure that I was right.  The pregnancy became 'non-viable' about 5 or 6 weeks ago when the embryo died.  Because I haven't miscarried on my own (which I should have done weeks ago as soon as things went wrong) I need to go into hospital to have a curette.  It is strange that I feel oddly okay about things.  I have been through so many emotions this week, but because I knew straight away that there was something wrong, I have just been focussed on finding out what and moving forward.

We were not supposed to be able to conceive.  That is really the thing that has been hardest to come to terms with.  This really should not have happened.  But it has also made us realise that we truly are happy with the decision we made a couple of years ago when we decided to stop trying.  We are happy with the plans we have made with for our lives.  And with the decisions we have made.  So for the first time in many years we need to start being careful. 

And it has also made us realise that we need to take more control of our lives and start fully living it and seeing the plans we have made come to fruition.  That is why we have really started focussing on our hike, and why I am really keen to get back into my training.  We can't take anything for granted in life, and our plans will only come in to being if we put ourselves into them.  No more sitting back and watching life pass us by.  It is time to take this life we have been given by the horns and shake the shit out of it!



Emz said...

*huge hugs* Again, I'm sorry Kylie. It sounds like a truly horrible thing to have to go through, and what a huge shock seeing as you both thought you were unable to conceieve... I hope the curette goes as well as it can. Stay strong, which I know you will because you're an unbelievably brave person :)
You show life whose boss :)
Em xox

Debbie C said...

Wow. That's really big news, hon. I'm really sorry it worked out the way it has, but I'm also pleased you have both come to terms with it so well. Will be sendig you positive thoughts on Monday. xoxo